Published on: December 16, 2025

Disadvantages of Filing for Divorce First

Deciding to file for divorce is a significant step that carries substantial emotional, financial, and legal weight. For those residing in New York, where the laws and proceedings can be particularly stringent, being the first to file for divorce brings specific considerations and potential downsides. With the possibility of affecting the outcome of the divorce process, awareness of these disadvantages and factors is crucial for making informed choices that align with one’s long-term interests.

If you’re considering filing for divorce first in New York, seeking legal guidance can be a proactive step toward protecting your rights and future. Juan Luciano, an experienced divorce attorney in Manhattan, provides clear, effective legal counsel to help clients through this challenging time. Whether you reside in the Upper East Side, Tribeca, Chelsea, or any other neighborhood throughout the borough, we can clarify the implications of filing first, assess your situation, provide guidance on how to prepare for divorce, and develop a tailored strategy for your divorce proceedings. Contact Juan Luciano Divorce Lawyer today at (212) 537-5859 to schedule a consultation.

What to Know Before Filing for Divorce First

When considering a divorce in New York, one of the primary decisions you may face is whether to file first. Opting to initiate the process can carry various implications that affect the legal, financial, and emotional aspects of your life. Understanding the specific dynamics that come with being the first to file in the context of New York’s divorce laws is crucial.

New York operates under a set of laws that allow for both fault-based and no-fault divorces. The no-fault ground, recognized universally across the state, involves filing for divorce based on a separation of at least a year or an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage for at least six months.

When filing first, you become the plaintiff, setting the stage for the divorce proceedings. This role involves drafting and filing a Summons with Notice or a Summons and Complaint, which outlines the grounds for divorce and, in some cases, the specific relief sought, such as child custody, alimony, or property division. In Manhattan, these documents are filed at the New York County Supreme Court, located at 60 Centre Street in the Civic Center neighborhood of Lower Manhattan, which handles all matrimonial matters for the borough.

Key Steps Involved in Filing for Divorce

The process begins by filing the divorce paperwork with the County Clerk. For Manhattan residents, this means submitting documents to the New York County Clerk’s office at 60 Centre Street, near Foley Square, along with the required filing fee. As the filer, you must ensure all documents are properly prepared and served on your spouse, the defendant. Serving the divorce papers officially notifies your spouse of the legal action and starts the clock for their response. Your spouse has a set period to answer or respond to the complaint, a critical step that can influence the progression and strategy of the divorce proceedings.

The Supreme Court building at 60 Centre Street operates within the First Judicial District, which exclusively serves New York County. This centralized courthouse in Lower Manhattan means that all divorce cases originating from neighborhoods throughout the borough, from Washington Heights to Battery Park City, from the Upper West Side to the Lower East Side, are processed through this single location, where judges experienced in complex matrimonial matters preside over proceedings.

Common Misconceptions About Being the First to File

Many believe that filing first provides a significant legal advantage. While there are certain strategic benefits, such as choosing the jurisdiction and potentially influencing the timeline of the proceedings, the actual advantages can vary based on the specific circumstances of the case. Another common misconception is that the first filer can secure a more favorable outcome in financial settlements or child custody arrangements. However, New York courts focus on maintaining fairness and equity, and decisions are made based on various factors, rather than who filed first.

While filing first in a New York divorce can set the tone for the legal proceedings, it does not guarantee any particular outcome. It is vital to consider all aspects and potential repercussions before moving forward. Consulting with a knowledgeable attorney skilled in New York divorce laws can provide crucial guidance and help you make informed decisions tailored to your unique situation.

Strategic Disadvantages of Filing First

The decision to initiate a divorce in New York by filing first can appear to grant an upper hand, but several strategic disadvantages must be carefully weighed. This decision can have long-term effects on both the proceedings and the outcomes.

Loss of the Element of Surprise

One significant downside of being the first to file is the loss of the element of surprise. In divorce cases, particularly those involving contentious issues, having the advantage of timing can be crucial. Filing first notifies your spouse not only of your intent to divorce but also gives them access to your demands and the chance to strategize their legal response, potentially reducing your advantage.

Judicial Scrutiny

Filing first in New York can place you under immediate judicial scrutiny. When one spouse initiates the divorce, it may influence how the court views their role in the dissolution of the marriage. This perception might suggest that the spouse bears greater responsibility for the marriage ending. While this is not a rule, the potential for perceived bias exists and can impact the outcome of crucial decisions, such as child custody and alimony. Also, even though being the first to file provides the opportunity to present one’s case first, you may experience increased pressure to justify your filing, which can expose any weaknesses in your initial petition.

Complications in Negotiating Settlements

Initiating the divorce often sets the tone for how negotiations are conducted. Being the first to file might position you as adversarial or unyielding, which can complicate settlement negotiations. This perception can make your spouse less inclined to cooperate and more likely to contest the terms, leading to prolonged litigation and increased legal costs. 

While filing first for divorce in New York might seem to offer strategic advantages, it is crucial to consider these potential disadvantages. Each case has unique dynamics, and the decision to file first should be made with a thorough understanding and strategic planning, ideally under the guidance of an experienced divorce attorney who understands the nuances of New York divorce law. This professional guidance is essential in assessing whether the benefits of filing first outweigh the possible risks and drawbacks.

Disadvantage Description Key Considerations
Loss of the Element of Surprise Filing first notifies the spouse of the intent to divorce and the demands being made. Allows the opposing party time to strategize their response and potentially reduce your advantage.
Judicial Scrutiny The filing spouse may face increased scrutiny regarding their role in the marriage’s dissolution. Perception of bearing greater responsibility could impact decisions on custody or alimony.
Complications in Negotiations Being the first to file may position you as adversarial or unyielding, complicating settlement discussions. This perception can lead to less cooperation and prolonged litigation with higher costs.

Juan Luciano – New York Divorce Attorney

Excellent New York uncontested and contested legal rep Juan Luciano

Juan Luciano

Juan Luciano is a seasoned New York divorce attorney who has focused exclusively on family law since founding his solo practice in 2013. Admitted to the Appellate Division of New York State in 2005, Mr. Luciano is certified to represent both children and adults in complex family law matters. Known for his compassionate yet strategic approach, he prioritizes respectful, solution-focused settlements, while remaining fully equipped to advocate aggressively in court when necessary.

  • Former President, Bronx Family Court Bar Association
  • Faculty Member, Practising Law Institute
  • Certified in child protective and juvenile delinquency cases
  • Quoted and referenced in the New York Law Journal and Wall Street Journal

Financial Implications of Initiating the Divorce

Filing for divorce in New York triggers a sequence of financial obligations and requirements that can impact both parties. Understanding the financial implications of being the first to file is crucial for anyone considering this step.

Immediate Financial Burdens of Filing for Divorce

Filing for divorce incurs immediate costs. The individual initiating the divorce is responsible for covering filing fees, which are just the beginning. At the New York County Clerk’s office at 60 Centre Street, the filing fee for a divorce action is currently $335, with an additional index number fee of $210. Additional costs quickly accumulate, including charges for legal representation. Engaging a lawyer to prepare and file all required documents incurs further expenses. Costs involved in serving divorce papers to your spouse also add to the financial burden of filing first.

The spouse who initiates the divorce often faces higher legal expenses. As the petitioner, you are responsible for assembling all pertinent legal documents and evidence, if needed, which might require assistance from an attorney or other professionals. These preparatory actions can accumulate high costs. Furthermore, if the divorce proceedings are drawn out due to disagreements on contentious issues, the legal fees can continue to grow, reflecting the length and complexity of the case.

Financial Disclosure Requirements

In New York, both parties in a divorce are required to complete financial disclosure statements, which detail all assets, debts, income, and expenses. The party that files first must submit these disclosures early in the process through the Supreme Court at 60 Centre Street. Preparing these documents accurately involves meticulous gathering and organization of financial records, possibly necessitating professional help from accountants or financial advisors with offices throughout Midtown, the Financial District, or other business centers in the borough. This process can be costly and influence the decisions on asset division and alimony.

Initiating a divorce in New York sets in motion a range of financial considerations that can affect the filer significantly. Prospective filers must prepare for these responsibilities and ensure they have the financial resources to manage the proceedings from start to finish. Consulting with a skilled divorce attorney can help outline a clear financial plan and potentially mitigate some of the burdens associated with these initial stages.

Emotional and Psychological Impact

When filing for divorce in New York City, the decision entails managing not only the legal and financial aspects but also the significant emotional and psychological impacts involved. Recognizing these effects can help prepare individuals for the realities of divorce proceedings.

Potential for Increased Conflict and Retaliation

Initiating a divorce can sometimes spark increased conflict, especially if the decision comes as a surprise to the spouse. This can lead to retaliatory actions, both inside and outside of the courtroom. The spouse who did not file may react negatively, potentially contesting the divorce terms or becoming difficult to communicate with, contributing to a more adversarial divorce process.

Going through legal proceedings during a divorce can be a significant source of stress. For those who initiate the divorce, the emotional toll includes dealing with the end of a marriage and the responsibilities of leading the legal process. This dual burden can provoke a range of emotions, from guilt and fear to anger and frustration. The process becomes even more challenging if the responding spouse acts negatively or makes the divorce contested. These actions can intensify the emotional strain, making it difficult to focus on daily activities and long-term decisions.

Effect on Children and Family Dynamics

The decision to file for divorce affects more than just the spouses; it also has a profound impact on children and other family members. Children may experience confusion, distress, and anxiety as they endure the emotional turmoil of divorce and adjust to the new family dynamics. For families with custody matters, the New York County Family Court at 60 Lafayette Street in the Civic Center provides resources and services to help parents develop appropriate custody arrangements. Extended family relationships can also become strained, as family members may feel compelled to take sides or provide support during conflicts. Even if both spouses mutually agree that divorce is the right step, filing first can still impact how others involved view and respond to the situation.

Social Stigma and Personal Relationships

Even in today’s more progressive society, there can be a social stigma attached to initiating a divorce. The individual who files for divorce may face judgment or criticism from peers, family, and social networks, which can lead to isolation or strained social relations. This stigma can be particularly pronounced in certain cultural or social groups and can significantly impact the individual’s social interactions and personal relationships.

The decision to file for divorce in New York City carries considerable emotional and psychological challenges. The potential for increased conflict, the stress of prolonged legal disputes, the impact on children and family dynamics, and the possible social stigma are all factors that need careful consideration. Individuals contemplating divorce should seek not only legal counsel but also emotional and psychological support through counseling and support groups to help manage these impacts effectively.

Learning the potential disadvantages of filing for divorce first is crucial for anyone considering this significant decision. Filing first in New York City can lead to immediate financial obligations, heightened conflicts, and potential legal challenges. These factors can profoundly impact the overall process of your divorce and the well-being of all parties involved. Therefore, making informed decisions is essential to safeguard your interests and achieve a fair outcome.

At Juan Luciano Divorce Lawyer, our skilled New York City divorce attorneys can bring years of experience to your case and provide personalized guidance, helping you understand the potential drawbacks of filing first. We can assist in examining your circumstances, discussing possible strategies, and preparing effectively for the divorce. Our team is dedicated to supporting clients through each step, offering sound advice and, if needed, strong representation in court.

If you are contemplating filing for divorce first and require professional support, contact Juan Luciano Divorce Lawyer today at (212) 537-5859 and schedule a consultation.

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